avoidance, a cure for distress............

January is blowing past - quite literally as we had super-mendous 90 mile an hour gales that had the glass positively rattling in the window panes last night. I've been avoiding blogging for various reasons - mostly hormonal, but not all my hormones. Also been reading a book by someone called Neil something titled "Enough" - which is food for thought and making me want to retreat further into a burrow and hole up for the duration - however the sun shone briefly yesterday, as I humoured customers at the Farmer's Market - the lady that asked why she couldn't buy pheasants all year round....."well because they are seasonal" I told her, "Which season?" she asked..... I hate it when people talk to you like your trying to rip them off or trick them into something dodgy - it's only meat for goodness sake, an organic, lean and healthy - with tiny "food miles" into the bargain.I pointed out to one couple that the venison which we produce has only 30 food miles - going from larder to Sheridan's in Ballater for butchering and back again, to which he asked if that included the extra 10miles from the farm shop to the Banchory Farmer's market, I was tempted to ask if him if he'd be having Kenyan green beans with his casserole..... I'm ranting aren't I.
Food miles is one thing, kid miles quite another. I expect Finlay will require to lie down in a darkened room this week after his weekend of excesses. Thursday night - laser quazer birthday party -Friday an evening on the wii with his favourite babysitter -Saturday a full days beating at his favourite other game keepers shoot - Sat night unexpected sleep over at best mate (who never does sleep over's, but due to another local child's birthday party and his elder brother out of the house - left his mother without 2 of her children - who - poor thing - felt the need to fill up the bed space) I on the other hand - whilst thinking that maybe Finny could do with a rest found the thought of NOT having to struggle to get him into bed yet again -too tempting and packed him and his toothbrush off quicker than you could say "early night" -and finally, he was swooped up at 9.30 for his first visit to Pittodrie stadium - with another friend's grandpa - including the corporation bus (half price for OAP's) and the promise of a half time pie. (The origin of THOSE pies I'd really rather not know - given that the contents are grey, then brown - if you put enough HP on - and the grounds and burger van are situated right next door to the cat and dog home.....dog burgers....gross - but still lower on food miles.)Anyway - expecting tantrums on his return so now doubt will be rewarded with amazing visionary powers once again - might try putting the clocks forward 10 weeks early.
Yesterday morning's epic struggle to kit out and get out 5 individuals of different shapes and sizes to various disciplines - where 4 of them seem incapable of starting a sentence with anything other than "has anyone seen my......." Fergus was working in the farm shop - "has anyone seen my superman t-shirt" Fin & Hedge were beating "has anyone seen my boots, coat, waterproofs, packed lunch, shooting stick, dog whistle, flask, balaclava, gloves, dog x 4, loo roll, father," (yes really, Finlay asked that question....) Archie was playing rugby and managed to find his shorts and shirt,but the dreaded "gum shield, water bottle, spare studs and worst of all "OTHER rugby boot". We could find only one. 5 other rugby boots made their appearances, with and without their partners, but the necessary size 5 little bastard remained elusive. I blame the dog, she likes to take them outside - especially when it snows. Having become near hysterical and I left asking no-one where my brain, gloves, warm boots, purse, check list, meat, honey, game, chiller, till and float were -to find that "someone else" had taken out the plastic bags - so had to ask the bacon man on the next stall if I could borrow some of his!! I left chaos and boys at 7.45am and came back to chaos but no boys at 3. I then required an hours kip and woke freezing and got into trouble from the keeper for letting the fire go out. having then remembered to buy birthday card and present for 2nd party of the week, fill the car with petrol, remove the after 8 from the back seat, take rugby boots out of the bath, load the washing machine twice, check my emails, and reply -write a press release for the Poot (Portrait of Our Time) AND walk the remaining dogs - one that rakes, one that is past beating but not beyond shagging anything with a pulse, and the cairn who is in season - so marks a path all the way round our circuit that leads the adjoining farmers bloody collie to haunt our back door.....Infact there was the most wonderful dust up last week when 2 labradors, a scottie, a spaniel, the cairn, and the cocker set to with the collie, in the fragrant space that is our back door - 8ft square and smelling of cat pee - with a leaky plastic roof. It was like one of those cartoons in Tom & Jerry when there's a cloud and all you see is a tail and a tooth and a blur of barking and snarling.The cats - positioned on the shoe rack above the cacophony remained aloof and aloft with their paws and tails tucked in. Ive lost my thread now - which is probably just as well as I feel like Im unravelling - and I was probably only complaining anyhow.
I heard the best cat story for ages this week -a friend with 2 hunting mogs - the type that bring home their catches were alerted to the fact that one of their moggies was home by a loud rattling of the cat flap - not just the normal quiet swish. On investigating they found the cat - complete with mouse - still attached in somebody else's mouse trap. I rather fancy the idea that the cat had brought it in with an indignant "How do you open this bloody new fangled packaging"......
My third load of washing for the day has just completed - that will be all the rugby kit (except the size 5 boot)(and never tell a boy to put his kit in the machine as I Have found 2 pairs of boots, a gum shield, a psp game and a bottle of ribena - all still in a kit bag -generally don't like a hot wash) but anyway ready for the whole thing to start all over again next week......worst of all my Blog means that I have spent more time avoiding my tax return.Bummer.....procrastinate I shall no more.